BusinessBelle

Talking about change, leadership and innovation is easy. Talking about giving your fellow BusinessBelle counter parts a hand upward is easy. Actually creating action, putting time and energy where your mouth is…takes guts and initiative. One idea that any of us could run with: Start a mentor program where you work.

Challenge yourself to spearhead a new initiative in your organization focusing on building strong relationships and an “inner circle” network of similarly driven and capable women. Match experienced women with new hires. Match executive roles with entry level personnel who strive towards promotion. Get creative! You can start the program individually and grow it into a core element of your company’s culture. Just make a point to foster an environment where everyone involved understands the importance of “passing it on”.

If women could band together in this way, rather than competing with one another, we would eliminate the learning curve, maximize our capabilities, and maybe even conquer our reputation for being AWFUL to work with!

Imagine what we’d accomplish if we were committed to helping each other be successful rather than trying make sure we’re the prettiest?

One great thing about being born female, is the majority of us are born more comfortable “C”ommunicators. That handy “X” chromosome packs a natural aptitude for communicating insights, information and reading non-verbal communication cues from our surroundings.

One problem. We miss opportunities to maximize critical conversations because we’re too busy apologizing for speaking! Particularly in the south, we have a tendency to seek approval at all cost. This nagging habit negates our ability to make a strong first impression.

I observe this consistently in the sales environment but the trait extends to everyday life. Women routinely introduce themselves, speak out in meetings, and offer feedback in a softer voice. They unconsciously take measures to diminish themselves in an effort to accommodate the other party(s). We attempt “polite” but it comes across as passive. I’ve seen women literally shrink in stature when introducing themselves, to a group or an individual. This polite deference, results in missed opportunities. (Girl Speak abounds in these situations).

Example: Girl approaches reception desk.

She walks up slowly, not making direct eye contact for any long period of time. Instead she makes darting, frenetic eye contact so not to appear pushy. She approaches slowly, shoulders pulled up to ears and head tilted carefully to one side in anticipation of being noticed. Starting at nearly a whisper she utters, “Uhm hi there, (smile meaningfully, squint, shrug shoulders down) I’m just wondering if maybe you could tell me, etc…

Conversely the male takes a more aggressive, confident approach. They may even speak louder than usual with purposeful statements and urgency in their tone.

Example: Approach with a driven energy and direct eye contact. Hello, I’m Derek! I need X, can you tell me Y?

Ladies, our intentions are good. Unfortunately, we are leaving the door open for rejection instead of driving conversation and clearly communicating our objectives.

The most effective business communication is a happy medium between the two and is a good reminder that our unique natural gifts must be nurtured to net the most benefit!

On Thursday, January 29, Obama signed the first bill of his presidency–and what a bill it was.

The Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act reverses the 2007 Supreme Court decision that effectively made it impossible to punish companies who practiced wage discrimination. Until this bill, if someone in your company happened to slip up and let you know a male counterpart was making more than you - you only had 180 days from when the pay inequity first took place to file a suit.

I can guess how many times that was possible!

With this bill, companies are on notice. If you decide to pay a male employee more than a female in the same position (or vice versa) - be prepared to prove why he is out performing her in a court of law!

So sad it took an act of congress - but late progress is better than none at all!

Goodyear, who under-paid Ledbetter for more than two decades, is upset with the ruling and feels the decision puts companies like them in the:

“Unfair position of defending claims that are years if not decades old”

I suppose serial killers, tax evaders, rapists, thieves and other law breakers probably feel the same way!

Today’s inaugural coverage inspires hope and commemorates a new era in American leadership. Unfortunately we’re stuck in the dark ages when it comes to acknowledging the importance of our First Lady.

The coverage of Michelle Obama could’ve focused on her accomplishments as a working mother, successful attorney, her position as Mayor’s assistant in Chicago or her board position with TreeHouse foods. The story could’ve been about the trend of First Lady’s holding a post-graduate degree (Michelle is the third). Instead, the main thing to know about Michelle Obama is who and what she is wearing.

Yet again, we’ve “sex-in-the-citied” a serious position that could be used for advancing legitimate women leadership. Tomorrow, and in the weeks to come, blog entries, news articles and tv segments will be dedicated to critiquing what she and her girls wore and how they looked. They will even go as far as to give approval and rate her appearance!

There will be no comments on Pres. Obama’s attire. His wardrobe will be treated with the trivial frivolity it deserves in this circumstance. To publicly evaluate his wardrobe would be demeaning and disrespectful.

Jackie Kennedy was beautiful and had iconic style. But 2009 should mark how far the position of First Lady has come since that time.

The 2008 Presidential election was widely recognized and celebrated as a milestone for black Americans. His media coverage will foster a powerful wave of hope and inspiration nationwide but most significantly within America’s African American culture.

Meanwhile, a color neutral milestone went uncelebrated—the landmark political milestone for women.

Never in history had the political stage been filled with so much inspiring female leadership. While Geraldine Ferraro had already broken ground as the first serious VP contender in 1984, this year’s election spotlighted a convergence of exemplary women who defied gender roles (especially political roles) like never before.

This year heralded Sen. Hilary Clinton, who has defied the political good ol’ boy system, for better or worse, for her entire career and was just super delegates away from the Democratic nomination. Michelle Obama certainly isn’t your mother’s first lady material. No silent supporter, Michelle is a seasoned lawyer, who vocalizes her political opinions, gives stump speeches for her husband and employs an all-female staff of aides for her political role. Cindy McCain chairs the largest Anheuser-Busch beer distributor in the United States. Additionally, she founded and ran the non-profit organization, American Voluntary Medical Team, which runs trips for medical personnel to war-torn third-world disaster zones. And of course, Gov. Sarah Palin is the first and youngest female Alaskan Governor and 1st female Republican VP candidate. The snapshot of American politics this year captures a lot for women to celebrate, and I didn’t even mention Condoleezza Rice or Nancy Pelosi!

Instead of showcasing this bonanza of successful, working mother fem-power to inspire females nationwide, the media instead made sure we had a chance to pass judgment on their clothing price tags.

While it wasn’t celebrated in the media, I hope BusinessBelles everywhere recognize the opportunity to share this year’s election as a landmark of hope and change for women!

I am completely guilty. After initial reports surfaced of her pregnant teenage daughter and newborn baby with special needs, I jumped right on the bandwagon.

“She couldn’t possibly be a mother to that baby and hold her family together while serving as Vice President of the United States!”

The irony hit me like a Mac truck during her convention speech. Who am I to pass that judgment? What do any of the pundits or media know about her ability to handle both? And since when is that a concern for candidates? Many male candidates and incumbents have had to juggle family drama without their parenting ability being called into question.

The truth is I don’t feel confident in MY OWN ability to pull it off. Most women don’t – but we don’t get to decide she isn’t fully equipped.

The bottom line: We can’t expect equal consideration in some arenas but not others. If she is up to the challenge, Bristol and Palin’s other children will have one heck of a role model from whom to draw strength, inspiration and courage through all of their life trials!

As Sarah Palin stood confident and unwavering in front of millions (live and on air), knowing suspicion, doubt, and muffled gossip was on the lips of many, she spoke with presidential polish and small town self-confidence. She made no apologies only a case for why her ticket should win the election. Her ability to step into a presidential position should be determined by her voting record and previous relevant experience-not her parenting choices or gender roles.

All politics aside, Palin is a Businessbelle to watch and learn from. A true case study in being unapologetically beautiful, feminine, fierce and successful in a male dominated profession—she isn’t ignorant to the onslaught coming her way. In fact, she is moving toward it confident who she is and what she knows will be enough. Cheers!

Political views aside, a recent article about “the watering down of Michelle Obama” struck within me a deeply frustrating chord.

The Times writes Michelle Obama, a Harvard-trained lawyer, known for bold, frank talk - whose style is to say “Hey! I’m going to tell you where I stand, and you figure out where you stand,” will be undergoing an image makeover courtesy of her husband’s campaign.

The reason? American is scared of smart, mouthy ladies.

The makeover will emphasize all things modest, humble and soft. The first tactic deployed was appearing on The View where critics said she successfully “came across as a 21st century Welcome Wagon hostess.”

America’s pattern of “Stepfordizing” potentially powerful women is impossible to ignore. Hilary’s loudest attacks weren’t about her politics, the nation is obsessed with Condoleezza’s lack of a husband, John McCain’s wife is as sweet as apple pie but makes more money than her husband-(the horror!)

There is nothing wrong with being soft spoken or modest - but not all women fit that mold. Those that don’t shouldn’t be attacked. We are diverse creatures and should embrace that diversity. When did we last hear a male political candidate or business leader criticized for being “too aggressive” or “too sharp tongued?”

What purpose do those gender boundaries serve? Who do they serve?

I hope Michelle stays true to her own identity and refuses to conform for the sake of her husband’s campaign of change.

A moment of silence is in order for the passing of Reva Korda, the former creative head of Ogilvy & Mather - and BusinessBelle pioneer. She worked at Ogilvy for almost 30 years, starting as an assistant copywriter in 1951 and working her way up to creative chief before leaving in 1980 to start her own agency.

Ms. Korda spoke to gender challenges in the advertising industry in an August 1984 New York Times piece called “Some ‘Supermoms’ Who Led the Way.” In the piece she featured prominent career women who “bucked the tide of their times” by having children and staying in the workforce.

Korda was quoted saying “When I looked around the conference table I was always the only woman in the room, and two years after I became a vice president, I was also the only pregnant person in the room. I could sell anything when I was pregnant because men wanted to get me out of the room. It was a wonderful weapon.”

She also wrote a novel called “Having It All,” about what happens when a 49ish executive woman in a large advertising agency discovers she’s hit the glass ceiling.

Cheers to a woman who refused to be ignored, sidelined or marginalized!

Too often one hears the phrase:

“Just a housewife…”

I want to dispel that dirty colloquialism. Women raise our world/business leaders and women possess the skills to be one as well!

I believe the X chromosome is an advantage in the workplace. I coined the term N.I.C.E. to represent our natural aptitude to Nurture, use Intuition, Communicate, and demonstrate Empathy. This weekend I was able to witness a great example!

4 days and nights in a shared hotel suite with another couple and their baby girl exposed me first hand to a woman’s amazing ability to use her natural Nuturing ability to run a family. Women just instinctively know how to do it–and even children recognize it instantly. Men can be taught to help out, assist or even share responsibilities - but something more instinctive resides in female DNA.

A typical mother’s morning means she immediately:

-gets the children out of bed and into the bath
-changes diapers and redresses her children
-recites a reminder checklist for her husband’s day
-prepares food
-cleans up the mess
-calms down any squabbles
-grabs a quick shower
-throws on her face and gets dressed
-packs up everyone else’s belongings (lunches, snacks, extra change of clothes)
-commits everyone else’s schedule to memory

……all before lunch.

If that doesn’t seem like much, you should try it. Or observe how many baffled questions a male asks when trying to accomplish any of it!

As a domestic diva, one must possess at least all of the following:

-Courage to do what is best and not what is popular
-Strong decision making ability
-Quickly prioritize and execute action
-Handle tremendous stress
-Ability to identify trends

This is certainly the checklist of a leader. Whether you choose to be a working mom or “just a housewife” - never doubt you have what it takes to lead in our world just like you do in our homes!

A sweet BusinessBelle and amazing Mark Kay Beauty Consultant extraordinaire, Hilary Fiskeaux, recently passed a book my way. My review is in:

EVERY aspiring or successful business women MUST readMary Kay Ash, Miracles Happen

Using or even liking Mary Kay cosmetics is not required to glean inspiration from this book. The life of this amazing woman and the stories of her experiences supersede any profession. Mary Kay Ash had the motivation, drive and enthusiasm I only dream of having. Despite her death, Mary Kay’s words are so full of life they could invigorate anyone!

She very poignantly puts the responsibility of success on our own shoulders. Once more, the book details the importance of finding that success with grace and femininity. She admonishes whining or crying, lateness and losing your cool and encourages developing what we are naturally amazing with: intuitiveness and foresight! Here were a few highlights that struck me:

Some days you just don’t feel like it - but it’s your job so develop techniques for pulling your motivation from within.

If you have had a bad week, you need your team, if you have had a great week - your team needs you!

Physical symptoms and emotional stress can stop when you take control of your attitude.

To accomplish anything significant you have to have a plan–on paper!

Women do think differently - and that can be a tremendous advantage.

I encourage EVERY woman I know to read this book. Regardless of age or profession, you won’t read it without feeling motivated to be a stronger more successful human being!